Tag: prayer

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Little Person. Big Words.

Yesterday was Thursday. Thursday at my house is like the witching hour. “In folklore, the witching hour or devil’s hour is a time of night associated with supernatural events. Creatures such as witches, demons and ghosts are thought to appear and to be at their most powerful.” (Thanks, Wikipedia.)

Image result for witching hour

Last night was unique because of the long holiday weekend last week, which meant I had to do a grocery store run on a random Thursday night because of the jumbled schedules.

Thursday is always a mad rush to pick up someone from sports and someone else from Grandma’s house and make sure that the other someone finished her homework and has her library book for Friday library walk at school. It’s also the day when I’ve spent a whole week packing lunches, moving around Elves on Shelves in a clandestine and creative manner, and making sure Mass uniforms are washed for Friday church and by 8:00 at night, I. Am. Done.

Now, it gets dark about 5:00 in Northeast Ohio in December, and the barometer on my car’s dashboard said it was a balmy 28 degrees as I’m struggling to carry in groceries – still in my professional work clothes and shoes, no less – while my 10-year-old is asking me repeatedly to read through his science fair packet that came home today, although the science fair doesn’t take place till February, and my other child is insisting that HER Elf on the Shelf has mysteriously moved around during the day because when we left the house 12 hours prior, the Elf’s feet were in a different pose.

You get the idea.

Cue the frustration, and enter my youngest son. Out of the house he comes, wearing only socks and a t-shirt and begins to help me with the groceries, no questions asked. As I’m tossing items in the freezer that we keep in the garage, he looks at me and says, “You know, Mom, there is a season for everything.” And he took his bags in the house. I literally stopped in my tracks and thought about what he said, and how a little person could say so much with so few words.

In one of her books, author/blogger Tricia Lott Williford talks about how she dealt with being overwhelmed with too many tasks at once and realized the key is that we only have to do the next thing. That’s all, just the next thing.

(As an aside, I actually attended grade school with Tricia and she is now an accomplished author and motivational speaker. Her blog is phenomenal. A link to Tricia’s site can be found here.)

After my son made his announcement, I thought of Tricia and how maybe this is the season of doing just that – the next thing.

  • Put the groceries in the freezer.
  • Hang up my coat.
  • Find a hair tie.
  • Stop my son from plowing through the Moose Tracks that we just bought and getting chocolate syrup all over the kitchen, himself, and the living room floor.
  • Whatever the next thing is, this is a good time to do only that.

Last night, the voice of God sounded an awful lot like that of my sweet seven-year-old boy. In this season of rushing and gift-buying and holiday parties, don’t forget to slow down and celebrate the season of your life, wherever it may be.

Most importantly, never underestimate the power of God’s voice — in whatever form it comes to you.

~Amy

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The Full Monty.

The full monty is a British slang phrase of uncertain origin. It means “everything which is necessary, appropriate or possible; ‘the works’.”

Thirty-two years ago, someone that I love very much lost a family member to suicide this week, Halloween, 1987.  I have vague memories of the deceased – nothing major, mostly just “aha” moments when I see blurry snapshots; however, my friend’s recollection is a bit different.  You see, the person he lost to suicide was his father.  This time of year is a challenging one for my friend, because even 32 years later, the loss resonates.  I know because the actions – and inactions – of my friend say it all every year around this time.

Last month, Pastor Jarrid Wilson took his own life.  This story was extraordinary for a number of reasons.  One, Pastor Wilson was young, attractive, and hip.  Photos show his young, attractive, hip wife and children exploring the outdoors and playing sports – hardly the poster family for suicidal tragedy.  Two, Jarrid Wilson was an outspoken mental health advocate who struggled nearly his entire life with depression and suicidal thoughts.  Finally – and maybe most shocking of all – was the fact that Wilson was a minister, a pastor, a man of the cloth.  For nearly all Christians, suicide is considered an unpardonable, unforgivable sin.

Hours before his death, Wilson tweeted the following:

“Loving Jesus doesn’t always cure suicidal thoughts,” Wilson wrote. “Loving Jesus doesn’t always cure depression. Loving Jesus doesn’t always cure PTSD. Loving Jesus doesn’t always cure anxiety. But that doesn’t mean Jesus doesn’t offer us companionship and comfort. He ALWAYS does that.”

(For more on the life and ministry of Jarrid Wilson, click here)

There are some who question the existence of a benevolent God who would allow such a thing to happen.

My friend questions the existence of ANY god, period.

I have never struggled with suicidal thoughts or depression, so I cannot say I understand the mental state of those who do.  I only know several things for sure.

  • Suicide is a very permanent answer to a temporary problem.
  • The effects of suicide live on forever, embedding trauma and disorganized attachment styles in those who are closely affected.
  • I am not God.
  • You are not God.
  • My job is to be me. Your job is to be you.  It’s God’s job to be God.  I don’t know why He does what He does, and it’s not my job to figure it out, either.
  • What my job IS to do is to walk by faith and live daily the words of Romans 8:28, “And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.”

(As a side note, I always have found it interesting that Saint Paul doesn’t say “some” things or “when things are going well” they will work together for good.  No, he clearly states that ALL things.  All of them.  The whole shebang, the motherlode, the full monty.)

It is in that hope that my faith rests firmly, that the God we serve is more powerful than death, bigger than depression, and more powerful than suicide.

If you’re struggling with depression, suicidal thoughts, or the loss of someone from suicide, you are not alone.  Hope and help are available here:  https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/

And if you’re one of us who have been touched by the loss of another through suicide – even indirectly – know that I’m praying for you, friend.

“To everyone who’s lost someone they love
Long before it was their time
You feel like the days you had were not enough
When you said goodbye

And to all of the people with burdens and pains
Keeping you back from your life
You believe that there’s nothing and there is no one
Who can make it right

There is hope for the helpless
Rest for the weary
And love for the broken heart
And there is grace and forgiveness
Mercy and healing
He’ll meet you wherever you are
Cry out to Jesus.”

Words and music by:  Songwriters: Brad Avery / David Carr / Mac Powell / Mark D. Lee / Tai Anderson

Link to the official video by Third Day can be found here.

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But I don’t want to.

As I’m writing this, I’m dealing with all sorts of emotions.

Anger. Hurt. Betrayal. Sadness. Confusion. Worry.

In a nutshell, someone said something about me.  Not TO me, but ABOUT me to someone else.  My first reaction was anger.

Why wouldn’t you just come tell me to my face?  Why would you feel it’s okay to take the coward’s way out and say it behind my back?

My second reaction was sadness.  I feel sadness that we live in a society where people can make poor choices and then find ways to justify those choices.  I feel hurt, because I am always the one to go above and beyond for others, yet it’s clear that not everyone feels the same way as I do.

I turned to the Word for some guidance, and this verse came to mind.  Matthew 5:44 reads like this:  “But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you.”

No, I don’t want to. Nope.  Why should I?  I don’t want to pray for this turd. I want to find them and say exactly what I think.

I won’t, of course, but it feels good to think about it.

I broke down the words of Jesus in this verse.  He tells me to pray for those who “spitefully” use me.  The dictionary definition of spiteful is, “vengeful, mean, cruel, rancorous. Spiteful, revengeful, vindictive refer to a desire to inflict a wrong or injury on someone, usually in return for one received. Spiteful implies a mean or malicious desire for (often petty) revenge.”  https://www.dictionary.com › browse › spiteful

If I ever knew someone who needed prayer, it is for sure someone who gets pleasure by making others unhappy.  Jesus Himself prayed for those who persecuted Him, and was blessed by doing so.

I prayed for this person last night, and this morning, and even as I’m writing this.  That’s not to say it’s easy, because it’s not, or that I WANT to, because part of me doesn’t.

Watch me do it anyway.